I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
