His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I lost the right to judge tonight
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize