you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
