After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
