i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
