On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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