i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
