Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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