with your own penis?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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