I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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