i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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