Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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