New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
