I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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