Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
