ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
