You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
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I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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