Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
