It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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