Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
