i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
