Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
