WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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