So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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