so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
