Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
