The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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