we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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