Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
