she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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