he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Randomize
