There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
