My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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