its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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