How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
