chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
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He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
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Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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