how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
