The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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