I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
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