I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
ok first of all what the fuck
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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