we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The air was thick with penises
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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