I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
