I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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