at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
