Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize