thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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