you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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