it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
