You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
