i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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